Falling Apart
by bonniebonbon
Summary: "You and him are like an airplane. A bullet through the sky, going hundreds of miles an hour. You're going fast, and no one can stop you."


i. airplane

You and him are like an airplane.

A bullet through the sky, going hundreds of miles an hour. You're going fast, and no one can stop you.

[Sometimes _too _fast–sometimes you just want to stop for a moment and _think–_but everyone knows you can't stop in mid-air.]

In the beginning, he says sweet things and you blush, he smiles and says that you're beautiful and your heart melts. You know you are taking off–you're going up into the sky, up where no one can stop you, where everyone below will look above and say just how beautiful your airplane is.

[And yes, it _is _a beautiful airplane.]

Soon, your airplane goes through some storms, though you survive. There are some that last for hours–some for days–but after every storm there is a rainbow, and your airplane continues on its way (to where is unknown).

[Of course, your airplane isn't perfect . You still need to fix your wings every so often.]

* * *

ii. take-off

You and him are escalating. Higher and higher until you're among the clouds and birds are flying below you.

[You think it is a dream, but it turns out that clouds are only wisps of gas and water and if you dance on them you will only drop. You're not flying through a fairy-tale, and your plane is nothing but an ordinary plane.]

He loves you, you love him, and nothing can damage you, no one can get in the way. Everyone knows that the plane is the fastest when it ascends.

[Except for the crash, of course.]

:-:

He proposes to you only two months after the war, and you're delighted–of course you are. You can't show it though, because who are _you _to be happy while his family is still grieving over Fred? You decide to keep a secret, though Ron has no such intention.

It's a sweet proposal–traditional, but sweet. It's unexpected, though–fast, definitely. Some people would say that you're foolish, getting married only two months after you started dating–but you're in _love, _and you both don't like waiting.

"Yes, yes, of course!" you shriek immediately after you see him pull out a box from his jacket. You throw yourself on top of him with such force you knock him to the ground.

He laughs and tucks your hair behind your ear and whispers, "Brilliant," before he leans forward for a kiss. "But I prepared a bloody speech! Mind if I say it?"

You giggle and wave him on but you're hardly listening. You're the happiest you've ever been in your entire life, and all you see is you and him and nothing else. _Ron Weasley just proposed to you!_

[Though a part of you is scared–how fast can your airplane go before it falls?]

:-:

"We're getting married!" Ron blurts out, and the room falls silent, sounds of forks and knives scratching on plates gone. You look at the ground, embarrassed, and when you do gather the courage to look up, it is a painful sight.

The Weasleys you once knew no longer reside here at the Burrow, as this family is gloomy and quiet and _serious_. Percy sits at the end of the table staring guiltily at the chair beside George, mouthing the words, "I'm sorry," over and over again, as if he never heard his younger brother's announcement. Arthur stares at his food and Molly smiles weakly. "That's great, Ron."

Your fiancée is not stupid, though sometimes he may give that impression, and he can tell something is wrong. "I-I'm sorry," he stammers. "I shouldn't have told you, especially since Fred–"

George stands up all of a sudden, cutting Ron off. Grabbing his bowl, he walks to the kitchen and drops it in the sink, before running up the stairs two steps at a time. You can hear the door slam and the faded out sobs and it breaks your heart.

"Let's go, Hermione," Ron whispers to you, and you nod in agreement. You both had hoped that your wedding announcement would be more cheerful, but all along you had known.

Harry and Ginny are much happier about the news, and you celebrate together one Friday evening. Soon you and Ron are in high spirits again, and you confess he is the best thing that ever happened to you.

You're going fast, but you're not scared, because you know it'll only get better from now on.

[But has it ever crossed your mind that airplanes can only go so high?]

* * *

iii. airborne

You and him are soaring.

Now married, you can't wait to start looking for your own home together in the countryside. One for you and him–and perhaps a couple of children.

It was a quiet wedding, only your families and a few close friends were invited. Nevertheless, it was amazing, and the look on his face when he saw you in your white wedding gown was worth all the galleons in the world. You wish to live it again, sometimes.

_He_ is the one to find the perfect home–you know it was built for _you_ the moment you see it. It needs work, sure–a new roof, new floors to replace its current creaky hardwood floor, _furniture_-but its beautiful window seats and library makes it worth it.

[Of course, you have to work twice as long now to pay it off.]

:-:

You aren't what you were before–now a married couple rather than _just dating. _You sit on the porch in the morning and watch the sunset rise once in a while, but other than that and the short talks in bed before he falls asleep, you don't see much of each other. You conclude that it _happens _and that you still love him as much as you did three years ago.

[At least, that's what you convince yourself every night as your husband snores beside you.]

* * *

iv. storms

You and him are on and off. It makes you mad, but you deal with it because _you're_ strong and _he's_ strong and your _airplane_ is strong.

He leaves you when you most need him, and it pisses you off more than it should. He'll be back, you assure yourself, but still a part of you wonders what would happen if he didn't. _Oh but, of course he will!_ He's _your_ Ronald–he's the only thing you've got–and you can't afford to lose him.

You can't do anything while he's gone, you're sleep-deprived and you have red eyes all the time. Balls of crumpled tissues sit in the bottom of every waste bin in your house.

[You'd call it your home but is a house really a home when your loved one is gone?]

:-:

"Hermione?"

He closes the door behind him and climbs up the stairs, searching for you. "Hermione? I know you're here, I saw your shoes at the front door," he says.

You cover your mouth with your hand and try to quiet down your breathing as you crouch behind the couch. You don't exactly know _why_ you are hiding–perhaps your anger at him built up during the weeks and you are afraid you can't control it.

[Or perhaps you don't want him to see you like this, red-eyed and broken.]

"Hermione? I'm home!" He shouts. He walks to the kitchen and pours himself a glass of Firewhiskey. "Where the bloody hell are you?" he mutters as he continues to stroll in and out of rooms.

[The real question is, _where were you?_]

He finally finds you, and you're grateful–your back had started to ache and you couldn't silent your tears any longer.

"Blimey, Hermione…" he says, as he kneels in front of you. "I didn't mean to make you –I didn't know you were going to–I didn't think it was such a big deal…" he stammers as he gently wipes away your tears.

"You're my _husband_, and you _left me!_" you shriek. You know you shouldn't, you know you should just act like you're okay and that it's no big deal. You know that you should just forget about this and carry on being the happy fairytale couple everybody thinks you are.

[But it _is_ a big deal, and you are _not_ okay.]

He's taken aback by your sudden outbreak and starts to protest. "It was just two weeks, blimey, you act like it's been a year…"

"_Two weeks _is a long time, Ronald! A lot of things can happen in two weeks! You left me when my mum had just _died! _You left me when I needed you most!" It feels good to say it, to finally get rid of all the fury locked up inside of you. You don't admit to _needing _anybody easily, so he knows you're true when you say you need him.

"You…needed me?"

"Of course I needed you!" you cry out. His stupidity amazed you sometimes. "You're supposed to be there for me! You're supposed to cheer me up!"

[He's _not _supposed to leave you. He's _not _supposed to abandon you when everything is falling apart.]

"And how could I have done that, when you wouldn't even _talk _to me? You were being so bloody _difficult! _You were always crying, didn't eat a single thing–blimey, you wouldn't even let me kiss you goodnight!" he fumes. "You know, I thoughtyou'd be happy to see me!"

"My mother just died!" you shout as tears stream down your face. You know that there's no such thing as a perfect relationship, you've known it ever since the start. Still, you're _tired _of your fights, _the storms_–but you know that your airplane is strong and that you'll both survive.

[But after so many storms, will your airplane stay up?]

* * *

v. rainbows

You and him are determined. Determined to still be the Ron and Hermione everyone knows you as. The one from school, the one from the _past._

"I'm sorry, Hermione…it won't happen again. I promise," he says. Before, you would believe him in an instant–now, you're uncertain, and you can't help but feel doubt.

"I promise, I promise…" he repeats. He kisses you on the forehead each time he gives you his word, and you can't help but feel more and more at ease. You find a strange sort of comfort in the thought that even if you _did _leave, even when you found enough strength to–you would have nowhere to go. You're lost without him, even though you hate to admit it.

[You're still not sure whether that's good or bad.]

-:-

You always cave in. Perhaps you are not as brave as you thought.

He tells you he loves you and you say, "I love you, too," always a bit too fast. He says, "I'm sorry," and you forgive him a bit too soon.

But you're happy, when you're not repairing your wings or flying through a storm. And it's worth it–the tornadoes and hurricanes–because the rainbows have pots of gold at their ends.

[Or is that just a myth?]

* * *

vi. crash

You and him are over.

You know your airplane has crashed when you catch him in bed with another girl. You recognize her, but you can't care less about her, truthfully.

He begs for your forgiveness as the girl slips her legs into her skirt but all you can do is shake your head. You run out of the room before you start crying.

Surprisingly, the tears don't come. Instead, you lean over the railing and stare at the ground, your face emotionless. Perhaps you're still shocked. Your airplane had been so strong, after all.

[Unless your airplane carried a bomb, and it was meant to explode ever since the beginning.]

He follows you and continues to beg for your forgiveness, but you keep staring down at the ground below. "Hermione, please, I'm sorry, it was only once, I swear…"

Your tears suddenly flow, and your body shakes uncontrollably–he tries to hold you but you push him away._ How could he do this to you? _

He tries to comfort you and keeps repeating that it was just one time and that he did it because he missed you. "You were gone for a whole month on a bloody business trip! What was I supposed to do?" he reasons. It makes you cry even harder, and you know he's feeling hopeless.

You know that should make you happy, but you feel nothing. Or you feel many things at once–_too _many things. You think you're going to be sick.

[Airplanes do tend to make you feel that. Especially one with a bumpy landing.]

You feel betrayed and trusted; angry and calm; sad and happy; scared and relieved. You want to curl up and _die; _you want to get away from this mess, away from all these feelings. Your heart feels like it's going to burst–it's beating so fast.

[It is now that you notice that perhaps the bomb on the plane was your own heart.]

"Goodbye, Ron," you whisper, and you begin to walk down the stairs. "I'll be staying at the Leaky Cauldron, owl me the divorce files by tomorrow."

His eyes widen and he starts to object but stops when the girl walks out of the room, dressed. He looks at the ground and realizes what he's done, and nods. "Okay."

You continue walking down the stairs, and you swallow when you reach the front door. You want him to come down and say sorry, even though you know it'd make no difference.

[But it'd ease the pain, at least a bit.]

You step on some crinkled leaves when you walk out your door, and you notice that it's quite a nice autumn day considering everything that just happened. You start walking, not that you need to, but because you need some time to think.

[After all, your airplane flew so fast you never got to think like you used to.]

You wonder whether you could've done something to keep your airplane from breaking, and if he would dream of you at night. You wonder if you will meet another man afterwards, or if you will love Ron Weasley until your dying days.

Soon enough, tears stream down your face yet again. You wipe them with the back of your hand and conclude that it was never meant to be, despite what everybody else said. Still, you are slowly falling apart, and you don't know what happens next–how does a broken person repair herself?

Once again, your husband leaves you when you need him most.

* * *

Using:

"Where were you when everything was falling apart?" from "I Found You" by Mumford and Sons

"Is a house really a home when your loved one is gone?" from "I'm Coming Home" by Diddy ft. Skylar Grey

**Hope you enjoyed, I never wrote angsty Ron/Hermione so tell me what you think! :D Sorry for the messed up page breaking, that's fanfiction being stupid :p**

**EDIT: I recieved some reviews saying that I am "spreading the hate" but I wanted to make some things clear: **

**I'm not spreading the hate, I actually like Romione. I am accepting it, and I just wanted to write an angsty Romione story. I write angsty stories on pairings I like too.  
I can see how I come off like I'm spreading my hate but I'm not actually wanting to make it seem that way. I just wanted to write an angsty Romione where they don't end off like they should. Not all couples have good endings–especially Romione, where it seems like they will BECAUSE they are so imperfectly perfect for each other.  
I read many Romione's and I accept them, and I still like people who like them. Sorry, but I am NOT spreading my hate and I still READ and LOVE many Romione's. I am just writing an angsty Romione, and I am not the first one to do so.  
I want to make it clear that I was not spreading my hate and I love Jo, and I accept the pairing. She knows them the best and I know that. But fanfiction is for "what if?" endings, and I was just wondering what if Ron and Hermione didn't get married and have kids.  
I do not dislike people who like Romione. I also do not dislike people who like Dramione, or perhaps some other pairing. Pairings do not define who they are, and I'm sorry that you perceived me as biased and whiny for liking Dramione and writing a Romione fic.  
I accepted other pairings, and I respect them. I am not writing this to prove that Romione is bad. I have written Romione's before, so before you judge me for writing an angsty Romione please check my fics and see that I have written Romione's before, WITH HAPPY ENDINGS.**

**I am sorry, and I hope anyone who thinks I was spreading the hate will forgive me. I can't say I was not upset by these reviews, though, seeing as I took a lot of time and energy to write this fic. **

**POTTER ON,**

**Bonniebonbon**


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